Ouran Model

I am the very model of a Ouran High School Host Club Member
We have eyes the colors of hazel, blue and brown and amber.
We serve the very pretty ladies with our best ambitions.
Alas though, Kyoya is the only one who knows about fission.

I'm very well acquainted, too, with ladies and/or Belzenef.
Although I must admit on our tests what we never get are F's.
Although the majority of our members are rich, one is poor.
According to our guests, you'll never believe what we have in store.

I'm very good at Japanese, English, Math,  and Science as well
All of our designators have told us that we might never fail.
We have eyes the colors of hazel, blue and brown and amber.
I am the very model of a Ouran High School Host Club Member.

I know our Japanese history, both Kyoto and Nara.
But to get into our very private school, we must be fair-a.
I have my own quote that says "Handsome men cannot be hurt by water"
Although I do consider myself Haruhi's awesome father.

I can tell real doctors from those freaky perverted fake doctors.
Although I must admit, I have never seen Meet the Fockers.
Then I can hum Sakura Kiss, Ouran Host Club's awesome-ish theme song
And hopefully I will never, ever have to wear a small thong.

Then I can tell you all about Ouran's very pretty uniform.
And so I will try to prevent any of them from being torn.
We have eyes the colors of hazel, blue and brown and amber.
I am the very model of a Ouran High School Host Club Member

In fact, when I know what is meant by "Daisuki" and "Nihongo"
Although I have many friends I also have many many foes.
All of this just because I am the very very lonely prince.
Although in English class, we almost always use the past tense.

When I have learnt what progress has been made in modern Japanese.
I need a word to rhyme with that, oh look Gilbert, it's Sat a-gees!
In short, when I've had to host by myself for an entire day.
People might not believe it, but I am not at all super gay.

For my military knowledge, although I have none whatsoever.
How many times must I tell you? I am not in love with Trevor!
We have eyes the colors of hazel, blue and brown and amber.
I am the very model of a Ouran High School Host Club Member.